Compliments

Compliments!.. Don't they just get you even more hyped up and enthusiastic on your weightloss?

There are some people in my extended family or my mum's friends who expect you to be literally "skinny" in 3-4 weeks. OR, before they can "SEE" any progress you need to be able to fit into a size 12-14. They make me so mad! They struggle to lose 1-2 kg in a year since they are close to their ideal weight, but they expect the next person to lose 70 or so kilos in around 4-5 weeks. So they wont even compliment you and refuse to see that you are changing.

Then there are those who will compliment your progress and tell you how great you look every week when they see you.

I have a friend who has been telling me she can notice me changing every week. We see each other once a week. There is also someone else who is the same. These people seriously make my day. I mean I really don't want anyone telling me there is any difference when there isn't. However, when I notice the change, and someone else compliments around the same time, this just confirms to me that I am not imagining things or seeing things the way I want them to be.

I really don't have anything to compare to in measurements, but I can definitely see change in my arms, legs, and face even though it has only been 4 weeks and a little over 8 kg down post-op.

I can't wait until the end of next month to take photos and weigh-in. :) Oh, and I am really going to try hard not to weigh myself for at least another two weeks. I will die from curiosity as I will wonder if I have gained/lost or have made no change at all. :) I promise, I will not do it two times every day like I used to. :)

Cheers :)

Progress Photos - February 2010

Okay I know I should actually wait until Saturday to photograph for the actual 4 week progress or even until Monday the 22nd of February to have a full 1 month cycle, BUT I couldn't wait, and most importantly I don't really have the time after today. I didn't want to let it pass. I really want to monitor my own progress on a regular basis. So I will try to stick to dates.

I have not decided whether I will do the next photo/progress post at 8 weeks or full 2 months (22nd of March 2010). We'll see. There is still time for that.

I will need to put the measurements up within the next couple of days. Can't find the measuring tape, argh!

I can't really tell if I have progressed in terms of looks, because I do have photos in one of my previous posts from 2008 where I weighed around 135 kg. So I don't think I look too different compared to that. I wish I had taken full body photos before the operation. Damn!

Anyways, I guess I will have to wait until the next progress photo to see if there is any difference. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and need to keep my body busy busy busy. :)

Scale Hopper

I would like to believe that I am not the only scale jumper. :)

Interesting how we like to keep away from the scales when we know we must be gaining weight, and how we can't keep our hands off it once we put the effort into weight loss.

I for one could not step off the scales in the first 2 weeks! Especially since I almost lost 1 kg per day in the first week. Week 2 was agonising as I probably only lost around 200 grams. It was after the 2nd week that I decided I will not weigh myself before the end of week 3. I also weighed myself yesterday (as noted in previous post) since my doctor did not weigh me.

I am going to weigh myself once more this week (on Friday), then measure myself (I haven't done this at all - the only measurements are the ones the nurse has from my initial weigh-in at my first appointment with my doctor, and I don't have those), and take photos.

I may not be successful at doing this only once every month, but I will try hard not to weigh myself more than two times in a month... except for this month! Remember, I didn't get my fill yet? I will weigh myself at my fill within 1-2 weeks, but I might not record it here. :)

Hmm, I think that will work well. Weigh, measure, and photograph once per month around the 20th-23rd of each month! Yep, I like the idea. I have to work on my will power, because weighing myself so frequently and not seeing any results on the scales is messing up with my mind.

Okay, that's all I have to say for now. Current photos coming soon! :)

First Post-Op Appointment

I was supposed to have my first fill today, but it didn't work. Not happy Jan!!!

After driving up for over an hour to my doctor's clinic, it just didn't happen. At first my doc said it might be too early and tender for my first fill, but he gave it a try. After twisting and turning the syringe in my tummy to find the port, unfortunately he was unsuccessful. He gave me another doctor's name and number for my first fill. Apparently she is the best at fills. I actually thought wtf?! However, I need to make an appointment to get my first fill within 1-2 weeks. I will be making the call tomorrow morning and hopefully I can get an appointment for next week.

I am a little disappointed as I was looking forward to feeling some restriction. Even though it felt disgusting and I was about to chuck up into my doctor's lap while I could feel the syringe jabbing into my band, it would have been worth it if I had gotten my fill. Anyhow, I guess everything happens for a reason. So another week or two... Patience!

He didn't weigh me, but I weighed myself just minutes ago. I now weigh 134.5 kg. That is a weight loss of 8.3 kg in 3.5 weeks. I think that's great, but I feel a little discouraged when I think about my sister's weight loss of 20 kg per month for two months in a row. She lost 40 kg in 2 months. Amazing ha? Apparently her case is a record. She was banded in October 2009. She has a lot more to lose than me, and her band was filled a little during operation. Although, I am aware that 8 kg in just a little over 3 weeks is a good result. But you know how it is, you want that extra boost in the first month. I was hoping to be able to lose approx. 15 kg in the first month (after seeng my sister's results). I have been working out so much over the last 2.5 weeks. I guess I will see the results in the near future. As long as it's all weightloss from here onwards.... That is the most important thing. I am very happy to know that I will not go on the scales the next month wondering how much weight I gained!

I'm still new, but I already heart my lap-band!

Before Photos

I have always loved making memories with my camera. Although, never happy with the resulting photo! I have torn and thrown out most of my full-body photos, but I have kept some in the last couple of years thinking I would like a record of what I looked like before the lapand. Yep, fingers crossed and hopeful to succeed... I am working hard at the moment and it hasn't even been a month yet, so I'm scared that I won't succeed. If I fail this, then there really is no other option.. This is why I am scared.

Anyhow... I have travelled a lot in Turkey, and I was there again just late November in 2009. So almost all of the photos you see below are taken in Turkey. I hope to be able to make prettier memories out of photos including me in them in the not so distant future.

Looking at the photos it seems that my weight has been fluctuating between approximately 135 kg - 149 kg. Now my height is only around 163-164 cm. I had my first lapband appointment at 148+ kg, and went into surgery at 143 kg.

I will have my weigh-in and my first fill tomorrow.. well, technically today! :)

Anywho, the photos! Please note: I don't wear black for religious or cultural reasons. I love colours, but I believe that they don't suit me. It's something to do with my weight. I feel as though when I wear colourful clothing, I will be more visible, weight and all! FYI :)

Here goes...

Ewww... That's the first thing that comes to my mind when I see this photo of myself. I was very tempted to delete this from my hardware, but wanted to save it just so I could look back and see the difference.. I hope! This photo was taken back in 2008 in my Istanbul home, and I weighed approximately 138 kg.

Again, taken in 2008. Galippoli/Turkey. This was taken at the Troy site.

Weight approximately 135 kg.

2008, Troy, Galippoli/Turkey. Picturing hubby and I. 

Weight approximately 135 kg.

2008, Galippoli/Turkey. Weight approximately 135 kg.
You can just imagine how much I hate this photo. It disgusts me.

2008, The Bosphorus, Istanbul/Turkey.

Weight approximately 135 kg.

Early 2009, Melbourne/Australia. Weight approximately 149 kg. 

I had a stall at a festival. I can't imagine why I would pose with an ice-cream in my hand? I would not have done it if I was conscious about the fact that I was getting a photo taken. :) I normally do not do that!

November 2009, Istanbul/Turkey. You can see the Blue Mosque (Sultan Ahmet Camii) and the Bosphorus in the background.

Weight approximately 148 kg

November 2009, Istanbul/Turkey. You can see the Blue Mosque (Sultan Ahmet Camii) in the background.

Weight approximately 148 kg

November 2009, Istanbul/Turkey. By the way, my friend is 5 months pregnant!!!

Weight approximately 148 kg

December 2009, Melbourne/Australia. At a friend's wedding.

Weight approximately 146 kg.

I'm back and banded! :)

Yup! 22 January 2010.... After waiting 12 months for my health insurance to kick in, then another month for Xmas and New Years holidays to be over... Then it arrived... :)

I am now happily banded for a little over three weeks. Rapid weightloss recorded in the first week, but nothing else in the last two weeks despite sweating it off on the treadmill and trying not to eat more than 500 calories a day. Although I cannot say that I am managing too well in the last two days. Lucky for me I will be going for my first post-op appointment on Wednesday this week, and as far as I know I will be getting my first fill. Yippee! :)

This is me about 9 hours after the operation. Mum had come to visit me and she was quite upset to see me so pale and drowsy. Ahhh, mums... I love her!

All my tests are complete

It's 3:30 AM and I am still awake. Yes, that is the down side of working online and doing translations for companies around the globe. Of course this is all due to living in Australia, because we are never in the same time zone with the rest of the world! However, I kind of like it... I love working and I really love my work, but I really cannot see myself working 9 to 5 jobs. I did them during the summer holidays back in my teens and 20's, but that's what just made me hate it more I guess.

Anyhow... By Tuesday this week, I completed all the tests my doc required me to take. I did the sleep test. It was the worst ever! I don't think I struggled so much in my sleep ever before! I took the sleep test at home. My doc recommended I take that one. I have no idea why, because with such thing I always feel that I am going to get it wrong and I am always in doubt... Those elastic straps... Oh my God!!! I was told I had to strap them on tight. It took me 1 hour to strap them on, because I was upset with my hubby at one stage (just before going to bed) and told him to piss off. So I was left to strap it on by myself.

WARNING: Never ever tell your partner to piss off if you need to be strapped up for the sleep test. You can do so after you are all strapped up! :)

Anyways, after the frustration of strapping and taping myself up, I tried to get into a comfy position... now, do you think that was possible?

Well, it wasn't! So I lay down on my back because I was afraid I would pull a cord out or something if I lay on my side or stomach. It took me around 2 hours to fall asleep even though I was sleepy all day. I think I woke up approximately 10 times in my 6 hours of sleep. I distinctly remember crying a couple of times when I woke up because of the pain the straps caused. I wanted to turn but couldn't. It was horrible... But it was finally over in the morning.

After the sleep test, I had my full blood test taken and had a heart test done all withtin the same week. I wasn't aware that a urine sample was required when I went for the blood test, but apparently it was! Since I didn't know this I went to the toilet a few times before leaving home just so I wont have the urge to go at the hospital! So when the nurse gave me the bottle for my urine and showed that I had to fill at least half, I asked her, "what if I can't reach the minimum?". She said, "well you need to, that is the minimum". She must have noticed the puzzled look on my face that she said, "if you don't do it now you will have to take it home and then come back again when you can fill it".

I was so nervous that I was not going to be able to reach the minimum that I did it!

Sorry, is this too much detail?

OK... Then I had one more test left. The thyroid test. I don't think everybody goes through this test, but I was asked to take it as I was dignosed with a goiter when I was a child. My doc was concerned, because he said the circumference of my neck is very large, so he wanted to make sure that everything was fine. Apparently the position of the goiter on my throid could possibly affect my surgery.

I called 9 hospitals/centres for an appointment to have my thyroid ultrasound taken. They all gave me appointment dates for 1 month later. However, my doc asked me to make sure all test results reach him before my next appointment in 3 weeks (which is going to be at 11:30 this morning). I was lucky to be able to get one for Tuesday this week and they promised that the results will reach my doctor before I see him (fingers still crossed!).

The doctor who did my thyroid ultrasound was confused and asked me why I was sent, and I told her about my goiter. She said, "you have a very healthy thyroid, you don't have a single nodule, therefore you do not have a goiter, you are totally clear".

Hmm... Yes, I was happy that I didn't have a goiter, but I was also confused. I still am! I had it checked out by a couple of GPs as a child. My late father had also taken me to the Royal Children's Hospital. Even there they had said it was a harmless goiter.

When I asked the doctor who did my ultrasound what the thickness around my neck was, she said it looks like fat! I have always hated my neck for this reason. I have this tyre like skin/flab around the front part and I was told it will go away with surgery to remove the goiter. So, does this now mean that it will go away when I lose the weight? Let's just wait and see... I have never lost enough weight to see this happen. The most I dropped down to was about 5-6 years ago, and that was still obese as I was around 105-110 kg with all the weight I had lost.

The weight seemed to drop off so much easier back then. I was around 23-24 years old, I could exercise, and when I just cut out the food (I needed appetite supressants), the weight came off. I tried the same thing in the last 2 years, but it aint working anymore... which is why I need more drastic measures...

Anyways, this has been a long post. I will try to update again after finding out my results today. Let's hope all is ok enough to allow me to have my surgery...